Hope everyone’s New Year is off to an amazing start (in a good way), wow can you believe it’s March 1st???
Coming up later this week, I’ll be posting some tasty recipes as well as a couple product reviews of some products I’ve been using on this journey, plus I’ll update you on some of the little changes that are having impact for me.
First, thank you for your support, I appreciate it as well as the kind words many of you given!
Well…… I did expect some backlash, but I was surprised at the amount that I did receive. Again, I’m NOT sure how to stress this…. This is based on my journey and what I have been though and go though. I am NOT in any way trying to glamorize or encourage an eating disorder of any kind and YES, I do know both sides as I gained about 70 lbs. with 3 rounds of IVF 72 injections per cycle (which we had to have due to an injury my husband had), plus bed rest, even though I was sick most of the time I still gained the weight.
Again, I have been an anorexic from about 5-ish years old.
If you have been following, you know what led to me becoming anorexic so you can imagine the struggle since gaining weight to someone who was always told they were never skinny enough or good enough.
I am high risk/bedrest candidate because thanks to my ex-step monster’s years of abuse, I was diagnosed with Cervical Cancer at 14yrs. (yes, mother knew from the get go about all the abuse, even before she married him and he divorced her after I turned 15 yrs., not the other way around!) Anyway… between all that as well as the constant shaming and bullying from her about weight, you can imagine how it got 10 times worse once I did gain weight with IVF?? For the first time in my adult life, I weighed over 105 lbs. and the first time I wasn’t shopping in the children’s department for clothes for myself.
So, for those who that think this might be Bullsh*t or that I’m encouraging an eating disorder, sorry, with all due respect, but you’re out of your FREAKIN mind!!!! I do FREAKIN still struggle as this was instilled in me for more than ¾ of my life and I’ll be honest, at times beat myself for the weight gained, I have relapsed and many times I fight the urge to going back to anorexia, just because of the way something does or doesn’t fit me! It’s was my comfort zone so to speak.
But, I do know it’s not healthy, safe and nor the right way to get back to being healthy and I wouldn’t wish any kind of eating disorder on anyone!
Is there life and healing from and after an eating disorder? Yes, I do believe so and I refuse to think otherwise!
Being healthy is what's important, not the scale!
Is it or will it be easy? NO, sadly it's not
Will it be a constant struggle?? I wish I could say no, but so far, it’s, yes
Believing in oneself is tough, especially when it has been a long struggle and in spite of the struggles, LIFE is worth it, YOU are worth it!
Thank you for stopping by and your support, wishing you all many blessings,
Xo
Missy
***For those who don’t like my blog, please don’t read, please don’t contact, just move on!!***
No comments:
Post a Comment